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Posts Tagged ‘self improvement’

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 I love to think.  I love the satisfaction that I get when I think through something and come up with a great solution or a better way to do something.  I love to think about the topic that I will choose each week for my blog.  I can go on and on but I have recently discovered that my thinking could be vastly improved if I considered not only what I was thinking but how I was thinking.

I believe that there is a solution for every situation that may arise and if you send a “problem” my way, I will find a solution.  This applies to my own life.  I cannot solve other people’s problems because I don’t think the way that they do and I know that each person’s response to a problem is greatly shaped by their own personal experiences.  If someone wishes my point of view on a situation with which they are dealing, I can share that information based upon my perspective.  But every person has to think things through for themselves in order to reach a conclusion that works for them.

Now after all of my years of thinking, I have finally found that I have continually made that process so much more difficult and time-consuming for myself because I was allowing my emotions to enter into my thinking.  Sometimes it was a matter of what other people would think about my choice.  Sometimes I did not trust my own instincts.  Sometimes I did not believe that I had enough information because I wasn’t an expert in a particular area.  And worst of all, sometimes it was because someone else told me that I was wrong about my choice and would try to get me to do something differently.

Now the more I thought about my thinking, the clearer it became that I cannot reach the best decisions if I keep straying into an emotional realm.  So I have been practicing and each time I start to allow emotions to enter, I stop myself and go back to addressing the problem.  If I feel that I need additional input, I will do research and I will discuss the matter with those whose opinions I respect.  But in the end, I need to make my own decisions.

I first ask/pray for guidance and direction from God. Then I gather all of the information that I can find, ask others that I trust for their input and allow my instincts to come into play.  With all of these factors, I make my decision with the knowledge that I did all that I could with the information that I had and based on who and what I am as a person, I know that I have reached the best decision possible for me and for me, that will always be enough.

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Originally I had planned to announce a new program this week but it seems that I need to delay it for at least one more week. So, I have decided to address a subject that I have never completely understood nor supported.

Yes, I have made New Year’s resolutions and never was able to keep a single one of them and I do not personally know one other person who has been able to do so for any length of time. Let’s be honest. If it was as easy as setting a date to make a major change in our lives then we would never have to wait until the New Year. We could just decide that today, January 4th, we are going to lose 30 pounds or any other of a long list of personal behaviors that we want to change.

All of our behaviors have evolved over a long period of time and it is totally unrealistic to think that you can just change overnight. Any behavior has some sort of root force within ourselves that needs to be understood and addressed before we can make a major change. And in addition, there has to be some sort of motivation to make that change that can help to sustain the change over a long period of time.

Two years ago, I decided that I wanted to lose weight during 2007. I decided not to set a number. At the end of the year, I had lost 2 pounds. I made the same resolution last year. At the end of 2008, I had lost an additional 8 pounds. This results in a net loss of 10 pounds over the last two years which to me is a major accomplishment and I never had to make this goal an all-consuming focus in my life.

I was aware that there needed to be some changes made but that did not mean that I had to eliminate everything that I most enjoyed. I had to learn that I could still have my favorites, just not as frequently. By not punishing myself by eliminations but rather limiting my selection of those things that were not so good for me, I always knew that I could have those choices so they did not seem so very important anymore and they were not a focus in my daily thinking.

I am going to try that with other things in my life this year. I am going to pursue a number of new goals and I will do so at a pace that works for me. I don’t have to work on everything everyday. I may not even start on some until later in the year. I just know in what areas I wish to make changes and will definitely have made significant progress in all of those areas by the end of 2009. Now that’s a resolution that works for me!

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